MY Grown Up Christmas List

Ive realized that Ive become an adult, officially. This realization has occurred due to the things I want for Christmas:

1. My car cleaned/detailed interior/exterior
2. A vet visit for Peanut for his annual shots plus flea/worm meds
3. A basket of kitchen essentials (things as simple as Ziploc bags, napkins, saran wrap, Dawn dish soap, etc)
4. An oil change + tire rotation
5. My Car's  air system fixed (it doesn't seem to blow on your feet...and some how water gets trapped under floorboards)
6. A Vacuum



And yes, all of them are serious. Too bad Christmas is usually a time that you receive things you "want" and not need. What if you really want the things you need...more than things you dont really need. Sure i'd love Gossip Girl Season 3, but Id be much more appreciative of warm feet in my car when it snows or not having a rug covered in dog fur every day. Just sayin.

One day. (my new catch phrase)

________________________________


On a happy note, this holiday season is by far the most enjoyable as this is the first time Ive spent it with Jeremiah Parris. Its more magical than ever. I love him more each day. 8 months today, and going strong. I look forward to what exciting things life has in store for us. Good and Bad, we'll stick it through together.

Happy 8 months love!

This Just About Sums It Up

He says it's none of my damn business, how much he drinks.

And he doesn't have a problem, no mater what the whole town thinks.

At his baby's birthday party, there was whiskey on his breath,

Everybody wants to save him, but he's not ready yet.

You wanna scream, you wanna cry.

You want someone to tell you why,

All the hope that's in your heart is not enough.

You hit your knees, you shake your fists,

Oh, it's the deepest wound there is,

When you can't help the one you love.

Her sister reads the bible, her father sits an' snores.

They're with her every minute, 'cause they may not have many more.

She was dancin' in New Orleans, only seven weeks ago.

Life may go on without her, but not the life we know.

You wanna scream, you wanna cry.

You want someone to tell you why,

All the hope that's in your heart is not enough.

You hit your knees, you shake your fists,

Oh, it's the deepest wound there is,

When you can't help the one you love.

When someone's slippin' away,

Right before your eyes.

How useless we are,

Is a painful surprise.

You wanna scream, you wanna cry.

You want someone to tell you why,

All the hope that's in your heart is not enough.

You hit your knees, you shake your fists,

Oh, it's the deepest wound there is,

When you can't help the one you love.

When you can't help the one you love.

- Terri Clark

Balancing Two Loves

I am finding myself completely baffled by people that have it together. And by "it" I mean their lives. And by "their lives" I mean that they don't seem to have any trouble balancing everything they want, need, and hope to do. Maybe its all a mask and they really don't have it together. Maybe that's part of the balancing act is just making it appear that you're balancing everything. Being a magician. Maybe? It sure would make me feel alot better if that were the case.

Ive been in this situation before. But its never really carried as much weight as it does now. I'm working a 9-5:30 job, going to school 4 nights a week, have a dog that needs attention, and a man that I love and want to spend time with. Not to mention a family, friends, and the costume shop. Theres just not enough time in the days to do it all. The sad part about all of that, is a huge part of my life used to be theatre. I lived and breathed it. And now, I find it hard to even make it to other people's shows due to my own life continuing as normal. But the catch is, I'm not living my life with regrets. Im not sitting around hating life. I love my life. I love the people in it. I just am starting to miss my first love....the theatre.

How do people balance that? More specifically, how do couples balance their relationships when they're also involved in theatre? I know just from school demanding so much time that it can put a strain on a relationship to spend that much time apart. But there must be some magical equation that makes it work? No? Then surely theres some keys. Im at a point where I dont want to do theatre just to do it. That its okay to say no when Id only be doing something out of obligation. That in itself was huge. But what happens when I want to do something...but I also would like to spend time with the man I love? I dont know. Ive never been in love. And theatre is a big part of who I am. So how do I make them jive together?

I just feel so torn. I want to do both. I want to spend time with him, and still be involved in shows. But when Im involved in shows, my time with him is minimal...and that is a sad sad thing for me (and him). However, if I dont do shows, I eventually start getting the itch of missing them. I cant imagine my life without Jeremiah. But I cant imagine my life without theatre either. I dont want to choose between the two. I wont. They will coexist in my life. They have to. I just have to figure out how. How to balance it with all the other hats I wear.

Theres an opportunity that has come up to stage manage for a director that I love dearly and have worked with often. The catch is, rehearsals start 2 weeks after my school ends. Then there are two weeks off for holidays and we pick back up for rehearsals in January and rehearse til we open totaling about 6 weeks. By the time school is out, Ive just had 8 weeks of hardly seeing Jeremiah. They've been hard so far, and I can imagine they'll be harder as it continues. So to ask a patient loving man to spend another 6 weeks away from me? I feel like its cruel on some level. He's wonderful and tells me to do what I want to do. He will support me in whatever I decide. He wants me to be happy and wants me to not give up things I love. But I love them both. So, its just simply I dont know how to decide. There are consequences to each decision. Cant I just do both? haha

I know that next summer I will be busy starting in June running through the end of July with Carousel (which Ive been planning on since this last summer). And then I'm going to audition for Annie which will run next fall (its been over a year since I've been in a show already, by then it will have almost been 2 so Im really hoping that will work out). So if I take this Dec/Jan/Feb job, it will be three shows in one year. Ive done more before and loved it. But I had no one else to think about. My time was not better spent any other way. Now it is.... not that its better but its a whole different kind of deal. I wont do theatre all my life. Eventually I'll be too old or have too many kids or things of my own to do. I do plan on being with him all my life. But those facts dont make my decision any easier on whether to commit to another show.

I know its possible. I know it can happen. I just need to figure out how.

Or clone myself.

Discouraged

Today Im totally discouraged. Not neccessarily about the diet. Or weight loss.Or portion control i.e. being hungry. But Im discouraged about food today.

I ate this lunch, that smelled awesome when I cooked it, but tastes horrible. Its extra lean groung beef, a small tomato chopped up, and minced garlic. Ew. Ew. Ew. I couldnt do it. I forced myself to eat it a few days ago and today I couldnt. I ate all the meat out of it, and tried to eat some tomatoes and couldnt.

Then for dinner I went out on a limb and prepared some shrimp. Ive never bought or fixed shrimp in my life. However it looks delicious and Im very excited about it. The issue was I didnt know what vegetable to fix with it. SO last minute I grabbed a baggie and put fresh spinach in it. Im sure that wont be real delicious by any means.

So here's where I am. Ive eaten everything I know I like fixed just about any way I know how to for two meals a day for 19 days. Im out of ideas. And not only am I out of ideas but Im burned out on things. Im burned out on chicken. Im burned out on tomatoes. Im iffy about raw spinach. I really only like (or atleast how i'd know to cook it) beef, chicken, shrimp...onion, tomato, mixed greens/spinach. SO my diet has been very limited. Ive been all over websites finding receipes but my issue is that I need receipes that I can throw together in a total of 30 minutes. Im in real estate school at night after working a full day and the last thing I want to do is cook up some grand meal. Not to mention lots of the meals require a ton of spices that I dont have and probably wont use again (im not much of a cook to begin with).

Im not saying Im quitting. Im just discouraged. I need to know something delicous, particularly in the vegetable department, so that I dont get so discouraged I give up. I have amazing encouragement not just from my friends, boyfriend, and family here but from NYC (yay harrods!). But its getting hard to be bored and unpleased with food.

Any suggestions? Id gladly appreciate them. I can only eat the following:

100 grams of veal, beef, chicken breast, fresh white fish, lobster, crab, or shrimp.
One type of vegetable only to be chosen from the following: spinach, chard, chicory, beet-greens, green salad, tomatoes, celery, fennel, onions, red radishes, cucumbers, asparagus, cabbage.


and I have the one fruit down. I just need help with creativity for the vegetables and meats. Badly. No sauces, oils, spreads, starches, sugars. Pretty much any seasoning though. Got it? Ok. Who wants to come cook for me?

OOO I am excited about being reminded about eggs. I can have 1 whole + 3 whites. I bought that stuff last night. Trouble is, I have to be able to cook it at the time Im going to eat it. Which means Monday - Thursday, and Sunday lunch is not an option for egg. Bummer right.

On the bright side I have lost 21lbs in 21 days. On the other side, Im running out of gusto with food choices and still have 10 more days of this particular phase of the diet. Atleast after that I can eat things like cheese.

Wow. This took me the few minutes of my lunch break left and my whole afternoon break. Oh well. Its worth it.

I Cheated.

Yesterday at the wedding the hunger + hormones + everyone else drinking and eating got to me. I cheated on the HCG diet. I had lots of strawberries and grapes, a cracker with spinach artichoke, a small spoon of mac and cheese, a small spoon of beans, two baby carrots, two broccoli, and a deviled egg. The sad part, it wasnt even that good. I cheated for food that didnt satisfy my cravings. :( SO needless to say today is an apple day. I gained .7 (less than I thought I would). And all day its water and a total of 6 apples.

This could be interesting. But I did it to myself.

Here goes nothing!

On the other hand, Ashley and Daniel had a beautiful wedding! She looked gorgeous. Its awesome to see her finally married to the man she loves. It had been a long time coming. :) Im so happy for them both.

Life is Good

Today is a good day. Theres no particular reason really, its just that kind of day. I didnt even lose weight today. You'de think that would set my mood, but it doesnt. Im still down 16.1 pounds in 15 days. I am just feeling good about life today, so I got up earlier to come to work earlier to post this before work started. However Im sure it will be added to at breaks (Im going to actually take them today).

My Job is awesome. Im really really enjoying myself here! I feel like Im not only a big help to my boss, but I actually enjoy what Im doing. Theres lots to keep up with; lots to track. Ive been so busy that I havent even remembered what time it is to take my two breaks! Not to mention yesterday I was 15 minutes late for my lunch break due to getting things done. All that is not a complaint. I actually enjoy it! Its fun! And it makes the day FLY! Also, when you have a boss that cries from joy when they see how you organized their email with lables, its a good feeling. I felt like I kicked ass yesterday at work. And I liked that feeling.

My diet is going well! Its actually alot easier than I anticipated. The first few days were difficult but then you get used to it. Youre not as hungry. Its great. Though being not as hungry means I dont reach for my water as often. Before the water was a filler when I was starving. So im trying my best to keep the water intake up! I will say that the diet is weird on the digestion track. I will leave it at that, but those of you who've done HCG know. Originally I was only doing this for the 21 day term. But Ive decided to go for 29 days. That will make my first day to eat whatever I want, Thanksgiving. What better day, right?! This means, my drop days will not end next saturday but 8 days after it. And then three more days of 500 calories. And then no starches, no sugars for 21 days leading me right to Thanksgiving. I am excited about this plan! And the good thing is, that if I get past next saturday, and it gets too much for some reason, I can always stop then because Ive done the 21 day minimum. After Thanksgiving, its back to just watching what I eat. Trying to cook healthier. Excercising a little each day. A good healthier life you know?

Jeremiah and I were talking about that yesterday. About cooking more, and eating out less. And just watching what we eat. The two of us doing it will be easier than just one of us. Im happy about it! Speaking of Jeremiah, we have now been together 6 months. Where has the time gone? Just yesterday we were making excuses to snuggle on a smokey couch, and now I cant imagine him not being by my side. Life with him is all I need. Weve also recently talked about going back to church and getting back what we'd "lost". I just know that for me, its been something that I know the longer I'm out of church and Gods presence the harder it is to go back. But going back after being burned is so hard! And it wasnt just like a curling iron burn. We're talking, joan of arc. So its hard. But I know its going to be okay. All I can do is put myself back in church and learn and heal in the process. So thats what Im doing. And lucky for me, Jeremiah is there to do it with me. :)

I have a few short things before I close:

1. Jeremiah got a job! I am so so proud of him. It may not be the job he wants, but we all start somewhere. Either way I am super happy for him.

2. I had a horrific experience with my apartment and a fridge, so I complained. And yesterday got a brand spanking new fridge!!! Its beautiful. Seriously. It may not look like anything special to you all, but its gorgeous to me!

3. Peanut has managed to knock his "gold" tooth loose. One day it was protruding, now its back in place but lose. Its a matter of time before it either falls out or the vet wants to take it out. He'll be a hillbilly. It will be ridiculous.

4. MY MAMA HAS A BOYFRIEND! <3 and I like him a whole lot. Its great to see her smile and laugh the way he makes her. Its awesome.

What I'm Realizing

When you remove the foods your body is used to eating and then restrict yourself to only eat certain healthy fresh items you start to realize alot of things. For instance, the sampling of foods that you were partaking without realizing it. I mean, Tasting food as you're cooking it...a chip or in my case now, a Melba toast, here and there. And that's not even thinking about when you lick the peanut butter knife. Or when you grab a candy bar every time you go to walgreens as a snack. Talk about caloric intake without even noticing.

Then today I was on my way to work when I got a call saying to not come in at 9 but to wait tim she called after her 10:30 appointment. The thought immediately went through my brain "you should drive through mcdonalds or go get donuts" because that's what I used to do. Extra time before work? Ok, time for extra calories. I've done it even when I've already eaten at the house. How sick is that?

Also, my boss has been super sick all week ao I've been home all week. Being home all day makes it super hard to keep on the diet. SUPER hard. Because you're just sitting around (or running errands even) and you want to eat naturally. Its the boredom eating. On Wednesday, I wanted to sit down with a bag of doritos in front of the tv so bad. Instead I drank water until I was distracted.

I've also realized that certain places make me want to eat. Like my sisters. And so when you have a place that already makes you want to eat and then everyone is eatin the stew that the delicious aroma filling the house came from...it sucks. I'd just eaten dinner before going there. But I wanted the stew. At class last night, our instructor brought my favorite pizza see...Alfredo...and again I'd just eaten dinner before class but I wanted that pizza. Beiber instance did I eat the temptation but it's so hard no to. Especially when it's the evening and you're used to eating all hours of the day if there's something that tastes good.

I have gotten alot of flack for doing the HCG diet. People worried about risks and saying it's not healthy. There may be other ways to do it, but I need instant results to get myself motivated to change my lifestyle. And it's working. For now, it's working. I'm down 10 pounds in under a week. I'll know measurements soon. But it's being successful so far. And when I do the maintenance part I'll follow those rules too and then eat healthier and exercise and keep going. What I'm liking most, possibly even more than the weight loss, is realizing all these things about my old habits that have led me to the place i'm in today. Needless to say, this is a good time in my life. An eye opening good time.

Ps I apologize for typos. Again this is from my phone which changes words all the time without my wanting it to.

Lights, Camera, Life

Jana and I discovered today that you had to change your settings so that anyone and everyone could comment on our blogs. I wish I could have known that earlier. I love feedback. And ps, Im making my first post from my phone. This means there will probably be a ton of mistakes. Im hoping nothing so big you cant understand. If so, I apologize.

Friday I started my new job. We did very little of what I will actually be doing on a regular day, but we had a good day regardless. I feel the Leigh is going to be a good fit for me. Atleast I'm hoping that's the case. I'll know more once this following week is over. I think working and going to school in the same place may get old though. I'll just have to keep telling myself "it's just ___ more weeks". At this point, we're talking 7. I hope I'm able to do well enough to pass the test the first time. It's been a long time since Ive been in school.

Friday night Jeremiah and I went to see The Diary of Anne Frank at Poteet Theatre. I wasn't sure what to expect. But my expectations, whatever they were, were exceeded. It was a beautiful portrayal and extremely emotional to watch. I found a particular sentiment in watching Shawna And Madison Linck actually portray another mother an daughter relationship. It brought their moments to life in a way that only a real mother and daughter could. Moments that often had me in tears. On a side note, I had no idea Anne was such a brat to her mom! Having never read the diary, the hatred toward her seemingly faultless mother broke my heart. As a whole I was thoroughly pleased with the show, an proud to be associated with such a production. No matter how small my contribution may have been.

Saturday was filled with delicious sandwiches at Neptune. If you haven't been, you should go. I'm going to be craving them while on this hcg diet. Which, speaking of the hcg diet, I started it on Friday. The first two days are load days. Which mean anything and everything you want. It...was pretty awesome. Today was my first day of 500 calorie Ewing and while it's been unpleasant being hungry and only habit water to satisfy that...I think this will be completely doable. I'm pretty stoked. Though let me tell you...having your boyfriend ask if anyone wants any donuts while your stomach is growling and the donuts are your favorite comfort food....not so much fun.

And No Day But Today (yes, I did that), Jana and I went to see RENT at OU. I was so proud of Christopher Rice. Watching someone do a dream show..dream role...is special. I was impressed by the production as a whole. OU has got some talented students! And I'm happy to say that I know one of them. And now...it's Sunday night and I'm ready to watch Dexter at the Griffis with my boyfriend. Because after Dexter...it's bed time for me. I am ONE sleepy kitten.

Just Another Day

I started real estate school last night. I havent been in school in 7 years, so the idea of going back to school scared me enough. However, its for a new job and it will give me more options in my future so its worth it I suppose. So last night I was ready. I had my jamba juice in one hand and my notebook in the other and just as I step out of the car....I spill Jamba Juice all over myself. Seriously?! I was not happy. I cleaned off what I could and tried to get in the class to a seat as quickly as possible. Naturally I chose a seat all alone toward the back of the class. This class is going to kick my butt. They even tell you that the national average of people passing the real estate exam is under %51. Apparently for my particular school the passing average is %74, but with a class of 12 thats not too assuring. Needless to say for the next 8 weeks Im going to have to relearn how to study so that Im not wasting my new employers money by taking this class. Yip-i-dee-doo-da.

On a happier note FALL is finally coming in. Sure we still have temps in the 80s but its not the 90s or higher. PLUS our evenings and mornings are chilled. Its very promising. However I think the weather changes are to blame for my current health situation which is equivalent to a level of torture. I dont get allergy and sinus problems often. But I swear when I do, they're hardcore. I can have a sniffle one day and the next have an ear and sinus infection. So this time I've been trying to medicate and get the drainage out (even blowing my nose which I hate doing), though Im not sure how effective its being. I can still feel the pressure in my jaw and behind my eyes. Im hoping I wont have to go to the doctor about it but we'll see. At this point, Im miserable already. Seeing a doctor can only be moving in the positive direction. Im just cheap and trying to save the money or I'd go now.

(Sorry this blog has no flow to it...Im blaming all the medications Im hyped up on so that I can breathe and semi-function)

As Im finishing my last week here with Gary its weird. You'd think I'd be wrapping things up, trying to leave as much of a trail to follow as possible for those I'm leaving behind. Im not. Dont get me wrong, I am making notes when I think about it just in case they need to know it later on, but Im not going out of my way to make things simpler or dumb anything down. My concerns are making sure my external hard drive actually contains all the right things that I need to keep from my laptop (that will no longer be mine in a few days) and making sure I get everything out of my desk. When you've been somewhere 5 years your things end up all kinds of places. I am at a point where Im just ready to go. This week seems pointless. That may be because Im so miserable with sinus problems or because I started school...but regardless its pointless. Theres nothing happening in the next three days thats going to make a difference in how it will work after I'm gone. No one is learning anything or trying to keep up with what I've got going. Im ready to go. Start the new job. The new life.

I just realized last night that while Im excited about all my shows coming back on tv...I wont get to watch any of them for 8 weeks because of school. Really? And I dont have DVR. Or internet to watch them online. So Im not real sure how I'll swing that yet. But Im bummed. And its 8 weeks of missing my beau. :-( Things we do for our future.

To the Point

This man holds my heart.

The Winds of Change

5 years going on 6 and I finally am leaving my job. I left once before. I was gone 2 months and hated the new job so I came back. There were stipulations of course; stipulations that werent met. Stipulations that would have made a huge difference that may have made my job more long term. However, in the long run I think maybe it was all supposed to happen this way. Where I am now brought me to where I'm going.

As of October 1st I will be working for a friend of mine, Leigh Singhisen. She's a real estate agent for Coldwell Banker. Ive never done real estate but Im up for the challenge. Im ready for a job that I dont have to worry about taxes. Somewhere that Im not stressed out because the entire office and profitability lays on my shoulders. It will be nice to not feel alone in my work. It will also be nice to know that Im not digging a hole I cant get out of someday.

Will I miss my office? Yes. Absolutely. I love who I work with. Theyre a bit of a family to me. We all know each others business. We all have been in each others lives every day for 5 years now, so to have them gone will be a weird thing. Im also going to miss the casual setting. So casual that at times its probably ridiculous but its nice. Appearance hasnt been a priority here; it will be there. And of course theres all my flex time. The fact that I can be off whenever I want with pay, no limits really. (I know what you're thinking...sweet, right? It is, but it comes at a price.)

All I know is these last 8 days of work are going to kill me. Day 2 and the stress has only gotten worse. Why? Because Im being helped even less, and on top of that Im being asked to do 2 times as much. I guess he thinks he'll squeeze as much in while I'm here as possible. What I think is maybe he should take on some of the responsibilities and try to get them done while I'm still here to help him through it. You know, try to learn to atleast doggy paddle before you're thrown into an open ocean of tossing waves? I think it seems logical. He doesnt. So 8 days down, and I cant wait for them to be over.

New apartment. New love. New job. New me? I also start a new diet jump start to get healthy and keep it life style. I always hate talking about them online because I know it probably sounds like a broken record. All I know is that I am ready to do something. Im tired of being tired. Of feeling unattractive. Im just over it. Again. But it needs to happen. I need to be healthy. I want to be healthy. I feel like Im getting a new season in life, and I want this one to not be held back by my self conscious body image. I want to be confident when I walk into a room. I want to look in the mirror and not hate what I see. I want to be able to dance and not care.

On a happier note, all last week I got the company of my Laceface, Lacy Reed. Let me tell you, when you live with Lacy, you eat well. AND on top of her company, I had an amazing girls night last weekend! Sometimes its nice to just get with the girls and eat, drink, and talk til you cant possibly keep your eyes open.

Girl Talk, Gossip, Gab, Laughs, and Good Times

Indoor S'mores and Homemade Crab Ragoon

No Better Time Than Now

I figure if I'm going to have a blog set up I should probably use it. I used to love blogging; we'll see how it goes. I have no real intention, set purpose or direction for the blog. I suppose it will just be whatever I feel like writing about in my life at the time. Cant hurt right?

I recently moved into a new apartment. If you know me, you know I move A LOT. In fact, this will be the 12th time I have literally packed up my stuff and moved to a different location...all in about 5 years. Its been quite ridiculous and I am aware of that. But this place is a keeper. It was built in 1928. This is part of why I love it so much. It has all these neat bits of character: an arched doorway, a wall cutout for a phone, an ironing board that comes out from the wall, wood floors. Its perfect for me and Peanut (who happens to be the cutest dog in the planet). Not to mention that the location being closer to my sisters house is a huge plus.

I have never been happier in an apartment. Its more than an apartment to me here. Its a home. And I'm working on making it mine. All my life Ive had hand-me-down things; this time around I wanted things in my place that I PERSONALLY picked out. So I've been selling almost everything I had so that I would have the funds to buy all new things. I'm only a few items away from being done. I've already bought my first kitchen table, bed, rugs, curtains, and I got the red couch I've always wanted! I just need to sell my dresser and my love seat, purchase a chair or chaise lounge, and then I'll be done. I cant wait. Its been quite the task but its so worth it. It makes me feel like I'm growing up in a sense...making big purchases...creating a home. Its exactly what I needed after turning 25.

25 was a big year for me. The last time I remember FEELING older on a birthday was when i turned 20. I was leaving the teens and that felt like a big deal. I suppose it was in its own ways but 25 is a much bigger deal. I always thought I'd be married with at least one kid by 25. Especially since I was ready to be married at 18 (and I don't mean like a kooky ridiculous school girl ready). Little did I know God had other plans for me. If Id have been married when I wanted not only would it be to someone awful (haha) but I wouldn't have been able to dive into the theatre world like I did. Not that you cant be married in the theatre world, but when I dove in I DOVE in. We're talking 7 days a week. No marriage can survive a 9-5 PLUS every night at the theatre 365 days a week. Its just not possible. Id have missed out on lots of experiences and relationships that I feel have been a big part of who I am today. I don't know where or who I'd be without all of that influence and love. I was always one who moped about being single during my teen years. And in my early twenties til recently I had actually adopted the idea of single "cat lady"...though my pet of choice would be dogs. Cats are icky, haha. This was a legitimate thought process that Id seriously almost come to terms with. And then things changed.

Its a beautiful, exciting, wonderful thing when someone you've known awhile starts being noticed in a different light. And its even more beautiful, exciting, and wonderful when you realize that person has noticed you in the same light. So after lots of awkward goodbyes in the Griffis front lawn, heart pounding nervous texts, and moments that the butterflies could carry you away I found myself dating the most amazing man in the world. Friday will be 5 months with Jeremiah, otherwise known as Jeremiah Lamentations or Meerkat depending on the crowd. I can honestly say its been 5 of the greatest months in my life. I can also honestly say that I never would have thought you could fall in love with someone so deeply and sincerely so quickly...but you can. And I did. I now only look forward to the exciting things life has to bring us.

"Us": A word I'd almost given up on.